zenmondo: (Brothers by nemisisusa)
[personal profile] zenmondo
Continuing the theme from the award-worthy post by [livejournal.com profile] ladyshanae in [livejournal.com profile] jedi_knerds, here is a recent life-lesson I have learned from my son.

My son has really been taken with the idea of Anakin and Obi-Wan being brothers. He understands that this is something that was just declared, and not an accident of birth. A bond of love between two men. Brothers.

He has often said that he wants us to be brothers. I see this as a close bond between men, and not him not wanting to be my son. To him being Brothers has the most potent emotional and life connection there can be.

At first I wanted to correct him about we being Father and Son, and not Brothers, and how that was better, but it turns out that I was wrong, and my five-year-old was right.

In Episode II, Anakin says that Obi-Wan was like a father to him, and by Episode III, they have become brothers. I think this is a natural and good progression for a Son to take to his Father.

It seems to me that in the end, Luke and Anakin became brothers for one brief moment before death -- still Father and Son, but also something more -- the brotherhood of man, the brotherhood of Jedi.

The story of Vader and Luke parallels much of my own story with my own father.

For most of my life, my Father was absent. He was also a warrior, a U.S. Marine, not a Jedi, and he fought in Vietnam, not the Clone Wars. This changed my father before I ever knew him. He had his own demons to fight, and for a while he "fell", and was absent for most of my life.

Before I turned 30, I felt the need to reconnect to my father who I had seen little over the previous 20 years, and had no contact for the last 12 of those. I tracked him down and called him, only to learn that he had recently had a major heart attack and was dying. I eventually was able to move him out to live (and die) with me. We had only a brief moment together measured in 10 months as oppossed to the 10 minutes that Luke had with his Dad. In that time, I feel like I had redeemed my father, and brough him back to the light -- just in time. I didn't have as much time as I wanted, but I had the time that we needed. I redeemed my father just in time to lose him, and I would not change a thing.

I realized with my Son's assertion of brotherhood, that in those 10 months, with me as an adult, and my father sick, our relationship was as much that as Brothers as that of Father and Son. I realize now, that this is the natural progression of things, that a good son will grow to become a brother to his father.

My son is quite early at 5, but I love to call him "brother".

Date: 2005-06-26 02:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] projectx.livejournal.com
that's incredibly sweet, and so very true.

Date: 2005-06-26 07:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] goldenmoonrose.livejournal.com
The relationship between Obi-Wan and Anakin has always really fascinated me, so I really liked your post about them being brothers and what that means for real human experiences.

I was always much closer to my brother (who is less than two years younger than me) than either of my parents, so I've always seen the brother/sister relationship as more important than the younger/older or authority/inferior relationship of parent and child. And yet, that's not to say that parental relationships can change into sybling or equal or partner relationships (at any age). Since high school, I've seen my mother as almost my sister or my equal, whereas my father still does the father-thing (nagging me or taking care of me).

For Anakin (or Luke) and all children, I think they need a parent who is a parent. Someone who lays down the law and takes care of them. But that, relationship, as seen in SW, has a lot of tensions and problems, too. When two people see each other as close, or partners, despite an age difference, there seems to be almost a closer bond.

Obviously, though, syblings, like Anakin and Obi-Wan, can have a falling out and "break up"s where one needs to be redeemed or brought back to the light. I have a best friend/sister who I've recently had problems with and see as falling to the dark side, so SW has new meaning for me.

I think I'm rambling, but that's because your post gave me some interesting food for thought. Guess that's why Star Wars is such a great saga, it has so much meaning for our real lives.

Date: 2005-06-27 05:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zenmondo.livejournal.com
I was surprised to find this in my own journal instead of the community. It may generate some dialouge there-- go copy it. :D

But I figure you saw this copy afore the one in the community.

Date: 2005-06-27 06:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] goldenmoonrose.livejournal.com
Yep, on my friends' page, I got confused. Will do.

Date: 2005-06-26 10:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elvenforever.livejournal.com
That was really moving. How insightful of Conor! And I LOVE the icon -- did you make it or did someone make it for you?

Date: 2005-06-27 04:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zenmondo.livejournal.com
[livejournal.com profile] nemisisusa made the icon -- but not FOR me, per se. But this essay had been in my head for a bit, and it lit the fire underneath me to get it out of my mind, and onto the screen.

Date: 2005-06-27 07:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elvenforever.livejournal.com
Well, it goes PERFECTLY with this essay. I was very moved by Sith. Maybe it's because I read the book before I watched the movie. Sith sparked an interest in Star Wars that I've never had before. I'll never be the fan you are, but now I'm definitely a fan! :)

Date: 2005-06-27 01:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nectarfizz.livejournal.com
I think he is quite obviously a genius...

my son was right

Date: 2005-06-28 06:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pippi-az.livejournal.com
yes he was! I have to say when I saw the first line of this post scroll across my friends page I said "oh, someone cool writing about star wars gotta read" then I saw it was you "ah, makes sense" and I read with enthusiasm....

sounds like you'll be breaking out all of those mens books a few years early :)

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