My latest satire

I started this a couple years ago, but was finally inspired to finish it tonight

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How to Create your own Ancient Celtic Tradition in Nine Easy Steps

1. Remember something your Grandfather may have said. Take this and claim that he was remembering and repeating an ancient tradition.

2 Rent and memorize every second of "Darby O'Gill and the Little People". Refer to every magical creature and character as an ancient Celtic Archetype.

3. Eat potatoes every day, claiming to follow an ancient Celtic diet.

4. Learn some Gaelic, but not very much. When someone questions you on your syntax or grammar, claim that it is your family's "Ancient Dialect"

5. Diversify your ethnicity. Use an odd combination such as, “My family was a Clan of Welsh-Irish Highlanders”.

6. Visit your local fabric store and pick out a pattern. Refer to this as your “ancient tartan”.

7. Insist that hamburgers and deep fried chicken bits are “authentic Celtic fare”.

8. Drink like a fish, and claim that you are under a gaesa to do so.

9. Don't forget to give yourself a great sounding title such as "High-Arch-Druid-Celtic-Shaman-Warrior-Poet-Priest"